I feel like I've been talking a lot more in the last few weeks than I have for a while. It started with helping at a college event to invite people to my church. Then I did an interview with my friend to advocate for those in the Neurodivergent community. All while attending activities that are meant to encourage conversations that help to create connections.
Inviting, advocating, encouraging, and connecting are among the best reasons for speaking. The instruction of "slow to speak" shouldn't make us wonder if we should continue to do these, but how we can better use our mouths for God's glory.
Being slow to speak when we are using our mouths for good can help us to collect our thoughts to allow us to say what we feel led to in the best way or question if that statement really needs to be said. Furthermore, taking time before you speak can help prevent you from using your mouth in a hurtful way, like gossiping or boasting about yourself.
No matter what, it's always good to take a moment and think before you speak.
After James instructs us, through the Holy Spirit, to be willing to listen, He teaches us to be slow to speak. A little later, James delves deeper into why it’s important that we’re able to control our words. It’s easy to want to just say what we think, but that isn’t what God wants.
God has many reasons for why He desires for us to be slow to speak or express words. Proverbs tells us that words hold power. They can have the power to inspire life and joy or they can cause death and destruction. In chapter 10 of Proverbs, we find that the use of words can lead to sin. This shouldn’t keep us from using our words for good, but from using our words carelessly. Both Proverbs and Colossians warn us that harsh words can cause anger and could hurt our witness to others. Using gentleness and grace in our words can, instead, calm and make the most of every opportunity.
How being slow to speak should look in your life: One, choosing your words carefully. When controlling your words with the help of the Holy Spirit, you must acknowledge the importance of and apply evaluating your words. Two, storing up wisdom then sharing. Speaking can take away the chance to gain wisdom. Make sure to gather and take in wisdom at times, so that what you express to others is beneficial to them. Three, waiting to calm down before you respond. Responding immediately in any situation, especially when your angry, can give fuel to saying things you don’t mean and put you in situations you didn’t want to be in. Lastly, asking for God’s help in controlling your words. Since you can’t control your words on your own, each morning pray that God would guide your conversations and words.
Here’s how not to be slow to speak: Think that you should always speak or believe that silence is always the answer – There are times to stay silent and other times to speak, don’t just pick one extreme. Using your words against others – You must make a choice to examine what You’re about to say to decide if it builds or destroys, and only allow out what fits in the first category. Believing that pausing or choosing silence makes you seem weird – Even people who aren’t wise can seem wise by deciding to stay quiet.
God's Guidance:
James 1:19 (NCV) – “My dear brothers and sisters, always be willing to listen and slow to speak. Do not become angry easily,”
James 3:3-6 (NIV) – “When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.”
Proverbs 18:21 (NIV) – “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.”
Proverbs 10:14 (NIV) – “The wise store up knowledge, but the mouth of a fool invites ruin.”
Proverbs 10:19 (NIV) – “Sin is not ended by multiplying words, but the prudent hold their tongues.”
Proverbs 15:1 (NIV) – “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
Colossians 4:5-6 (NIV) – “Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.”
James 3:8 (NIV) – “but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.”
Ecclesiastes 3:1 (NIV) – “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:”
Ecclesiastes 3:7 (NIV) – “a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak,”
Ephesians 4:29 (NIV) – “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
James 3:9-10 (NIV) – “With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be.”
Proverbs 17:28 (NIV) – “Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if they hold their tongues.”
Application:
1. Ask Jesus to help you as start working on controlling your words
2. Choose to be reflective in all conversations, examining your words before you let them out
3. Be okay with taking times to stay quiet and just observe wisdom, especially wisdom from God, then sharing it with others
Strength Point:
With God helping us, we can take time to choose our words and use them for the good of others and in furthering His Kingdom.
Reflection Question:
When do you find it hardest to follow the "slow to speak" instruction?
Prayer Prompt:
Hi Jesus! Thank You for the blessing of being able to speak, whether verbally, written/typed, signed, or artfully expressed. Thank You that You take time to speak to me. With Your Words You affirm us, encourage us, direct us, warn us, teach us, and intercede for us. I’m sorry for when I use my words for harm or my own glory. I want all the ways I speak to glorify You. Help me to realize that to do this, I must be slow to speak. I know that in giving me this instruction, You didn't mean for me to stay silent. In fact, please give me the knowledge to discern the moments of when I should be slow to speak from when it would glorify You for me to refrain from speaking. I pray that I would take the time to think over what I want to say at all times, to ensure that it’ll honor You. Remind me daily to use my words to be grateful and to praise You for who You are. You’re so good to me, Lord! I love You! In Your Name, Jesus, amen.
A Prayer to Pray over Others:
Hi Jesus! Thank You for the blessing of being able to speak, whether verbally, written/typed, signed, or artfully expressed. Thank You that You take time to speak to us. With Your Words You affirm us, encourage us, direct us, warn us, teach us, and intercede for us. I pray that my friend wouldn’t use their words for harm or their own glory. Create a desire in them to want all the ways they speak to glorify You. Help them to realize that to do this, they must be slow to speak. Let my friend understand that in giving them this instruction, You did not mean for them to stay silent. In fact, please give them the knowledge to discern the moments of when they should be slow to speak from when it would glorify You for them to refrain from speaking. I pray that they would take the time to think over what they want to say at all times, to ensure that it’ll honor You. Remind my friend to daily to use their words to be grateful and to praise You for who You are. You’re so good to us, Lord! I love You! In Your Name, Jesus, I pray, amen.
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